sandy cup

With life at a turning point I wait to see what happens.  I'm happy to be where I am, I look forward to going where I want to be but I find myself afraid at the tipping point.  What I've had in the past is gone but I'm still living in the shadows of my former life.  Can I keep it going?  Is there opportunity for me here?  Did I live out the moments and now must move forward?  These are the questions that I am seeking answers for.

I went down to the beach today to help pass the time and find some enjoyment in not being at work.  I drove down the street to find a cheap parking spot and an expensive coffee.  I strolled to the sand because that is where I should be spending my days instead of cooped up in an apartment less than a mile from the waves.

I finished out my coffee to find that I have a cup.  I have had plenty of empty cups from coffee in my lifetime and realize that I'm not quite done with this one; for the first time in five years of living within fifteen minutes of the beach that I have not played in the sand.  I scoop sand into the cup and slam it down to make a tower.  The tower of dry sand stood for a moment in time and fell back into the beach from whence it came.  It was starting to come back to me.  Some water helped solidified the sand to which inspired me to build a second coffee cup tower.

The realization that I have two towers and no mote made role up my corduroys and squat to start digging out the real estate that would protect this castle.  The elements rose up and flattened my towers and washed out my mote.  The great sea wall was then constructed and the protective canals around the estate were dredged deeper and wider to prevent future devastation.  Seaweed was added to fortify the barrier and feeling of content washed over me.  I was for sure enjoying myself.

The tide came in and my parking expired and now it was time to head back.  The coffee cup was disposed of, the castle of sand returned to the Atlantic and I didn't have a parking ticket.  Moments like this make me question what I have been doing with my time and whether I've been using it wisely and I know today that I've conquered the moment.